What we call each other in terms of respect varies from culture to culture.  Western cultures tend to use terms like Mr., Mrs., and Ms.

Korean culture uses your last name first like Henry David Thoreau would be Thoreau Henry David.  If you have a title that is the most important thing to use with your name.  It is disrespectful to use Mr. or Mrs. 

Vietnamese culture uses the terms uncle or aunt for older generations and sister or brother for teens, twenties and people who are the same age as you. I wonder if the Vietnamese picked up the use of family terms as part of communism or if it existed prior to communism.

Although, in US culture we use a combination of titles and terms if you think of it.  We may use Mr., Mrs. or Ms. for strangers as a sign of respect.  Titles for people in positions of high authority in context of government, military, religion, healthcare, or academia such as President, Vice President, Secretary of.., Congressman, Senator, Pope, Pastor, Father, Dean, Detective, Officer, Principal, Vice Principal, Doctor, Nurse, Mayor, Sheriff, Deputy, General, Private, Lieutenant, or Governor to name a few.  

For very close friends we often adopt terms of family Aunt, Uncle, cousin, sister, or brother.  If we do not specifically utilize the term when talking to them we often will describe our relationship with them as though they are "like a brother", "like a sister", "she is like another mother", " he is like another father", "my adopted grandmother" or "adopted grandfather."  All these give the connotation of our relationship towards the individual who we are talking about.  As much as using terms like colleague, coworker, acquaintance give the connotation of the lack of personal closeness in the relationship. 

In Germany, women are trying to eliminate the term Fräulein. They feel that why should a women's marital status be included in her title when man's is not.   This sparked me to look at the origin of the word Ms. in English.  Ms. actually originated in 1951 as part of a business letter writing technique not as part of the women's movement according to www.dictionary.com    It was a polite way to avoid the is she married or not question in a letter and avoid offending someone. 

I really find it fascinating to look at what we call each other based on culture. 

Can you think of terms that other countries use that do not translate into Mr., Mrs., or Ms.?  I would be interested to see if other people have noticed any unusual or unique terms in their travels.


Comments
on Mar 14, 2005
Great Article!!

This is more of a regional than an international example.

When I first moved to the South, I noticed kids using the title "Miss" and ""Mr" and a first name when addressing adults that were friends of the family, neighbors.. etc. It kind of reminded me of how Jock Ewing always called his wife "Miss Elly", even though they had been married for so long.

Being a Western boy, I didn't understand the practice, so I started tell kids at church and in the neighborhood, "just call me Ted". Well, you can imagine the reaction from parents at my perceived attempt to undermine them as parents. One friend explained the show of respect for elders and let me know that I should just accept being called "Mr Ted" with the respect meant.

I also noticed men using it when addressing or talking to women they didn't feel comfortable enough to be so familiar as to use just her first name.
on Mar 14, 2005

 

Thanks! Glad you enjoyed it.

Yeah, I have seen the southern usage of the Mr. and Miss with the first name too.  I have even noticed it among some of my friends in Michigan.  It is a respect in the familiar.

It goes along with the use of Ma'am.  In Michigan, it can be derogatory to be called ma'am in certain connotations and tones.    I remember being at a restaurant on the east coast with friends at one point and having a waiter call me ma'am.  After the waiter left the table, one of my friends asked "At what age does a women go from Miss to Ma'am?."  Considering that at the time I was in my mid twenties, I guess he thought I was to young to be called Ma'am.  

It is much like being referred to as an adjuma here in Korea.   It is ok to be called adjuma if you are older as a term of respect but if you are too young it can be insulting.

      

on Mar 14, 2005
It goes along with the use of Mam. In Michigan, it can be derogatory to be called mam in certain connotations and tones.


I learned this very early on in my military career. While we were required by regulation, to call commissioned officers "sir" or "ma'am" (as would seem glandulerly appropriate), the use of the nicety didn't always mean respect. ;~D

"There are those who get saluted, and those whose rank gets saluted". ;~D

Respect is only a gesture, if it isn't sincere.